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What is bacon jam, you ask? It sounds sort of gross on the surface, but deep inside it's a combination of savory and sweet that tastes like nothing you've ever had. Smokey, succulent, sweet, meaty, and spreadable on your favorite things to spread stuff on. On Christmas day, we spread it on fresh eggless hushpuppies and it was magnificent. We went through an entire jar in nothing flat.

But how do you make bacon jam? Apparently Martha Stewart had some thoughts on it recently, which brought some attention to some recipes around the web. As is my way, I went through a few, isolated what I felt was the core of the recipe, then added my own touches. Here is my recipe for bacon jam.


Greg's Bacon Jam

INGREDIENTS

Stage 1: Rendering
2 pounds bacon (I used one pack of the Fletcher's Dry Cure bacon they carry at my local Costco)

Stage 2: Cooking
2 large Mayan Sweet onions
2/3 cup (packed) dark brown sugar
4 cloves chopped garlic

Stage 3: Reducing
1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
14 ounces black coffee
1 cup maple syrup
1 cup plain apple sauce
2 teaspoons liquid smoke (3 if you really like it smokey)
1 tablespoon Tabasco sauce
2 tablespoons molasses

INSTRUCTIONS:

Stage 1: Rendering

The first and most tiring step is to cut all the bacon into approximately 1 inch pieces, then render off all those pieces in a large, cast iron, dutch oven over medium high heat until they're brown around the edges, but still soft in the middle. You'll have to do it in batches, flipping pieces of bacon about every 60-90 seconds. Even with thick cut bacon, it takes a while. Once the bacon is rendered, set aside on a paper towel to drain.

Stage 2: Cooking

Pour off all the fat then spoon a tablespoon or two back in. Chop the 2 onions and begin sauteeing them in the fat over medium heat. Add the brown sugar. The sugar will help the onions sweat like salt does and you'll find yourself simmering down a juicy pot of onions. Let it simmer until pretty much all the liquid has disappeared, the bacon fond has been absorbed by the onion/sugar/fat mixture, and the mixture is beginning to caramelize. Takes 30-45 minutes, depending on your stove's version of medium.

Stage 3: Reducing

Everyone in the pool! Put in all the remaining ingredients (liquids and bacon) and bring to a boil, then simmer over medium low heat for 2 hours until it's basically bacon in thick syrup. Other recipes will tell you to add water if it's getting too dry. Me, I believe that if it gets too dry, you're cooking it at too high a heat. If it's getting too dry, add a little water and turn the dang heat down a smidge.

After two or more hours, when it's thick and syrupy, remove it from the heat and let it cool 30 minutes.

Stage 4: Processing

In about 2-3 batches, run your mixture through 10-15 pulses in a food processor. The texture should be about the same as a tapenade. If you pulse it too smooth, it turns into sausage filling. You want it to remain chunky so it keeps the meaty, chewy texture of the bacon, but can be spread.

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This is a recipe I came up with to try to get more veggies into my kids. I'd made a soy hummus (more of a soy pesto), that my wife and I liked, and my boys both like edamame, so I just decided to put some soybeans in the food processor and see where my creativity took me.

First a note on prepping the edamame (soybeans). I defrost frozen edamame, then put them in a bowl and cover them with boiling water for 3-5 minutes, then drain.

In an electric chopper or small food processor process together:
1 cup edamame
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 seeded roma tomato
1 tsp lemon juice
1 tsp salt

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I'm posting some of the recipes from today's Fried Ball Ball. This is my eggless and "yankee" adaptation of Paula Deen's hushpuppies recipe since my son has an egg allergy and I don't see "self-rising" flour or cornmeal on my supermarket shelves.

1.5 cups corn meal
0.5 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp salt
1.5 tbs baking powder (1 tbs + 1.5 tsp)
1/4 brick of extra firm silken tofu
1 small onion (I used mayan sweets)
1 cup buttermilk

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I'm not sure how the idea came to me, but it did.

I make a neat little homemade chocolate cheese from scratch (heat the milk and cream, add lemon juice to curdle, strain, drain, and mix in cocoa and sugar... that easy). I was trying to think of a dessert I could make from it and came up with the following idea.

Make the cheese (possibly with some ground chocolate chips mixed in to make it a little more gooey when hot). Form the cheese into balls and then chill. Take a chilled ball, dip it in drop doughnut or funnel cake batter, and deep fry. Let drain, then skewer three or four balls together to make a kebab. Drizzle the kebab with a chocolate sauce that's been kicked up a notch with a little salt and some fresh ground pink peppercorn.

So, who dares me to actually make this (as my wife shakes her head and begs me to just say "no")?

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