I've heard many people use the phrase "Bow Chicka Bow Wow" or some variation on that for some time, but if I ask them if they knew who originated that, they all seem to think it's some rap star or black comedian. Nope, it was a really white guy named Jordan Brady about 20 or so years ago in the 80s. Here's some video proof.

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So, when people would say Barack Obama's name, pronouncing the "rack" like "clothes rack" instead of like "rock", it would make me think of Mr. T's character, B.A. Baracus from "The A-Team". And then a fun thought entered my head... Wouldn't it be fun to dress up Barack Obama like Mr. T? Show my support for Obama, plus get in doses of kitsch and 80s retro all at the same time?

So I hooked up with one of my regular illustrators who does exclusive clip-art for Fun Draw and commissioned a drawing. It turned out great.

Buy This On A Shirt At Zazzle
I pity the fool who votes for Hillary.

What better mix is there than Obama, 80s retro, and kitsch? Lovin' it!

The Mighty Quinn of the New York Daily News printed excerpts from my "Things Not To Say On A Date" list on the day before Valentine's Day, but he didn't know it was mine. I chatted with him, sent him part two, and he's printing selected excerpts from part two on Tuesday, February 27th.

For those of you who followed his link to this site, here's the entire list (parts 1 and 2 combined). This was written for my old humor column back in 1996, so if some of these seem a little dated, that's why.

Things Not To Say On A Date

1. "Nice outfit. Is that a wonder-bra?"
2. "I really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired."
3. "No wine for me tonight. My urologist says it's not good to mix alcohol and penicillin."
4. "I refuse to get cable. That's how they keep tabs on you."
5. "People say I remind them of Eddie Haskell."
6. "I used to come here all the time with my ex."
7. "I never said you need a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it."
8. "Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice on the answering machine every hour."
9. "I like clay. It's mushy."
10. "I really feel that I've grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn't have given someone like you a second look."
11. "And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest."
12. "I know you said you don't eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask."
13. "It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just won't be as smart as I am."
14. "Dropping my pants just scared them. But when my underwear hit the ground... Man! I never knew Jehovah's Witnesses could run that fast."
15. "Your sister's a real knock-out. Is one of you adopted?"
16. "For the longest time I lived with a hairdresser named Brice, but then I had this sudden relapse of heterosexuality."
17. "When we get back to my apartment, whatever you do, don't tease the pony."
18. "You know, if my wife wasn't so hung up on this faithfulness thing, she'd probably say you were my cutest girlfriend yet."
19. "You can trust me, I'm a lawyer."
20. "I had to break up with my last girlfriend. She welded a coat- hanger to the metal plate in her head and was using it as an antenna to read my thoughts."
21. "No, really, I read Playboy for the articles."
22. "My most painful memory? Hmmm... That would have to be when those three guys cornered me in the showers in prison."
23. "Who can blame Woody Allen?"
24. "I've been studying this new age stuff with a guy who channels Ed Sullivan. Last week I channeled Topo Gigio and told him where he could stick it."
25. "After our last date, when I got home I had this aching in the pit of my stomach. I thought it was because I missed you, but it turned out to be food poisoning."
26. "If I was a woman, I'd have Rush Limbaugh's baby."
27. "I guess in retrospect that "Clay Messiah: Parallels Between Jesus and Gumby" wasn't the best title for a doctoral thesis."
28. "How about after dinner we take a romantic stroll by the oil refinery? The fumes give you a really cool buzz."
29. "I was thinking tonight we'd go to a French restaurant. Have you ever been to Jacques En Ze Box?"
30. "I always wanted to be a doctor, but I couldn't get into med school, so now I just pursue gynecology as a hobby. I even have my own stirrups."
31. "Now I'm just speaking hypothetically here, but let's say you were at some guy's house, opened the refrigerator, and saw a human head. Would you call the cops?"
32. "I'm not free Sunday. I'm going to help OJ look for the real killer."

If you'd like more humor, check out my humor archives from my old column, or the stupid thoughts section of this site.

Every once in a while, in an odd mood, I'll just start looking up odd domain names to see what's available. There's no rhyme or reason to the list, just a rambling train of thought I follow. All of the domains below were available for registration as of February 26th, 2007 (i.e. you don't have to pay a premium for them, but could register them for their normal fee at your favorite registrar).

STRANGE DOMAIN NAMES

• Their parents will never find out... girlsgoneamish.com
• A football site that sounds dirty, but isn't... backfieldpenetration.com
• Don't like Bill n' Hill... clintonbashing.com
• Think Hillary is presidential material... hillarycandoit.com
• Think she's not... hillarycantdoit.com
• Two sites for odor-fighting products... destinkify.com and unstank.com
• Think you can blog?... ultimatebloggingchampionship.com
• Of course, if things get out of hand, there could be a... blogfatality.com
• Gassydog.com is taken, but you can still get... flatulentfido.com
• A massage site that sounds dirty, but isn't... hardrolfing.com
• For sisters who are sick of their male sibling, there's... buymybrother.com
• Wanna invest in my business?... hugelosses.com
• Are you a metrosexual p'tach who needs to man up?... klingoneye.com
• Interstellar diplomatic relations sites... klingonembassy.com, klingonconsulate.com, romulanembassy.com, romulanconsulate.com
• When the Enterprise needs some bling... pimpmystarship.com
• Found this last year, but no one took it... yumyumpotatoes.com
• A site that attracts deer... bigsaltlick.com
• Junk e-mail is caused by alien spirits... spamintology.com
• For those who don't want to take pills... schlongstretcher.com
• Probably everyone's wished they had one... bossvaporizer.com
• And I'll end off with one that could be a real, profitable site... tastylowcarb.com

Yes, if you're quick, or maybe just very strange and twisted, you could go to your favorite registrar like GoDaddy.com or Register.com and jump on one of these domain names for cheap. When I checked on Monday, February 26th, none of these domains were registered.