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THANK YOU: First and foremost, a thanks to all of you for sticking with me through all of this. You could have spent that time watching cooking shows or playing solitaire. Instead, you decided to spend it on reading my novel and I'm honored you spent it that way. I promise to keep you updated as I try to find an angel agent who has the foresight and character to represent this novel with heart and vigor.

For those of you who can't leave Kurt and Alain quite yet, remember that I'll be posting a deleted scene with them early next week. I also figure that there might be some nagging questions. If you have a question, mail me. If I get a handful of good ones, I'll do a Q&A post toward the end of next week.

And if you want to make sure you don't miss the next novel, visit the Online Novels page and subscribe to the whole-blog feed or the "Novels and Stories" feed.

Getting back to the story, Kurt teleported from the throne room in Heaven back to his tiny shared apartment in New York...

Hell on Five Dollars a Day

A Novel By Greg Bulmash
Copyright © MMVIII - Greg Bulmash - All Rights Reserved

Chapter 39 - Epilogue

Kurt woke up to the sound of his iHome playing a random song off his phone. The clock said it was 7:30 a.m. He had an hour to get showered, get dressed, and get to work.

His bed in the shared apartment wasn't any great shakes, especially not compared to the bed in Marie's house... Did he dream all that? He was tempted to try to make a miracle, but he decided not to. It was going to be so disappointing if it didn't work. This way he could hold onto the possibility that he hadn't dreamed it all. Plus, he thought, it seemed almost wasteful to perform a miracle for such a minor reason.

As he sat up and scratched himself, his iPhone beeped a calendar reminder. "8:30 a.m.: Coffee with Deuce at the Starbucks on the corner. Don't worry, you can be late to work this one time."

With an hour to get himself 2 blocks, Kurt took an extra 5 minutes in the shower, just enjoying the hot water. He washed every bit of himself to make sure that no speck of supernatural dirt remained on his body. Then he scrambled an egg and ate it on toast. He drank a glass of lowfat milk to wash it down. He'd have to give Henry a dollar for drinking his milk, but so what? He didn't have to worry about whether it was imported or whether it might leave him stuck in the apartment.

At 8:21, he put his keys, his wallet, and his iPhone in their respective pockets. He decided to leave the backpack at home today. At 8:23 he was on the street and at 8:29 he was walking into the Starbucks.

For a moment he didn't see Deuce and he feared he really had dreamed it all, perhaps programming in the calendar event in some half-asleep state. He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see Deuce's smiling face. The long hair had been replaced with a shorter cut. "Get a good night's sleep?"

"Yup," Kurt said. "Like the hair. Why the change?"

"Too many copycats. Coffee?"

Deuce bought Kurt a grande Mocha and got a venti Americano for himself. The place was packed, but miraculously a table opened up just as they were ready to sit down. Kurt raised an eyebrow, but Deuce shrugged. As Kurt sat, he silently wondered if anyone in the coffee house knew God was in their midst. "I'm always in their midst," Deuce said.

"You know, it's kind of creepy when you do that."

Deuce hung his head, but smiled. "Sorry." He took a long draw from his coffee, finishing off with an "aahhh," and then looked at Kurt. "So what's the plan for today?"

"Go to work, dinner with Mom and Dad, drinks with friends. Get back in touch with how human I still am before I make any big decisions."

"Wise," Deuce nodded. "No plans to rush out and save the world?"

Kurt laughed. "It's your world. I just live in it. I figure if you want me to save it, you'll arrange it so I'm pushed through a portal or roped into an adventure of some sorts somehow."

"Good," Deuce said. "But don't think it's one-sided. I'll be listening for your prayers. You probably won't need much now that you're Miracle Max, but just call to say 'hey' now and again. Okay?"

"You got it," Kurt replied.

Deuce stood up from the table and set down his coffee cup. "Well, I just wanted to check up and make sure you were gonna be able to adjust to being a civilian again. Looks like you've got a level head on your shoulders."

"Would the multiverse have picked me if I didn't," Kurt asked.

Deuce smiled a sly smile. "You'd be surprised." He turned and walked out, the crowd parting before him.



Kurt went into work. Apparently everything had been taken care of. There was a record of his approved vacation request and he'd had just enough time off banked to cover it. He got to his desk, loaded up Outlook, found he had a meeting in 4 minutes, grabbed a yellow pad off his desk and rushed up to the 7th floor.

He fired on all cyllinders in the meeting and got some positive feedback on the way out. The rest of the day went his way as well. He just felt capable of meeting whatever challenges the day threw at him, and he did it without any miracles, big or small.

Dinner with his parents was a little more challenging. They too knew he'd been on vacation and thought it had been planned for a while, but his mother was miffed that he hadn't called the entire time he'd been away. "We thought you fell off the face of the earth," she said.

Drinks with his friends was much the same way, but with less guilt... "How was the trip? Why didn't you call?"

Everyone seemed to have something to do in the morning. By 11 p.m., Kurt was alone at a table in the little pub they'd decided to hit. He wasn't quite ready to go home and be alone in his room yet. He still wanted to be in the presence of living people, even if he just sat back, nursed his beer, and didn't talk to a one.

A man in a grey overcoat entered the bar and Kurt watched the guy make a beeline directly for his table. "Can I help you," he asked as the man sat down.

The man put a photo of two couples on the table. As Kurt looked at it, he saw one couple was Alain and Marie, the other couple was the man across from him and a strikingly beautiful woman with jet black hair. The photo was in black and white, a bit frayed, and looked like it had to be around 50 years old. The man, on the other hand, didn't look a day older than he did in the picture.

"My name is Avery Stark," the man said. "I believe you may know the other man in the photo. A little under 2 weeks ago, he and George Miller entered a portal into Hell to save you. I know because I was there. Today, you showed up back in Manhattan without them. I'd like to know what happened to my friends."

Kurt leaned back in his chair and took a sip of his beer. "You might want to take off that coat," he said. "It's a long story."

THE END

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Hell on $5 a Day is a work of fiction, serialized by its author on Brainhandles.com. Excerpts may be used for blog posts or articles about the novel. The length limit on excerpts is 4 paragraphs. Any more extensive usage requires permission.

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16 Responses to “Hell on $5 a Day - Chapter 39 - Epilogue”
  1. Dave says:

    I was just wondering how many pages this book would be if it was in book form, do you know? would it be like a 200 page paperback er something? If you publish it, I will buy it, I want this to be in my book case! Great job on this one man. I'm really dissappointed it's over, and i'm really glad you didnt go the "dream" route, I hate when people cop out and make it AAALLLL a dream. If you do make a movie outta this, I'll tell ya who would be a good Kirt, He's got two thumbs and read the book from day 1, THIS GUY! hahah. Anyways, nice work man, I'm signed up for the next one!

  2. HoundOfDoom says:

    You should shop this as an outline and get set up to flesh this out to a novel. Might be worth e-mailing the guy at waiterrant.com for some guidance.

    GOOD WORK!

  3. Miladysa says:

    Great ending :D

    Personally I would love there to have been more action in hell at the end with Deuce, Alain, Albert & Co.

    Looking forward to reading the other books in the series and having dead tree copies of them all.

    Well done & thank you for a fantastic story!

  4. raul says:

    i so agree with what dave said if you do publish this book i will buy it for sure your story rocks!!!

  5. Baxil says:

    Hey Greg,

    I was laid out in bed as you published your last two chapters, but now that I'm feeling a bit better I wanted to drop by and congratulate you on finishing. Always feels great to reach a landmark like that. :)

    The full story of Legend of Hero has got a long way to go yet -- though at this rate it'll be about another month before I reach the "end" of the first major arc, which will be a landmark of its own. It's been great to see both of our stories unfold, and you remain an inspiration. :)

  6. daymon says:

    Well that is one way to know it wasn't a dream. Yep time to live and curb your hero ID. Good stuff.

  7. Myrrh says:

    Thank you for a wonderful story. And a very cool ending, too. I do hope I get to read more from you.

  8. Kevin says:

    Truly enjoyed the story. Hope you can get another one going...you got skills. Thanks

  9. kristen says:

    Wow, that was a great story! i stumbled across it when I ran out of books to read @ work and couldn't stop reading. Luckily you finished posting all of it on the 10th, I don't think I could've handled waiting for more posts every few days. I've already sent the link to a few friends, if this was published, I would buy it, and I think it could definitley be made into a movie. Anyway, you rock, great story, I can't wait for the next one.

  10. Cenge says:

    One thing I still don't understand. Who was Jesus in this story? One of the special people or just another human?

  11. Greg Bulmash says:

    @Cenge: I left it deliberately vague and open to your own interpretation. If I said he was either, then I'd be taking a stand on Christianity, and I didn't want to take a stand. The purpose of this was merely to entertain.

  12. Andrul says:

    I was actually leaning toward Kurt being Jesus :)

  13. renan says:

    Publish this as a book. It's just freaking awesome. By the way, regarding the viking king, eric. Viking didn't really have horns in their helmets.just saying.

  14. Ms. Brooks says:

    EXCELLENT novel. I pushed through in 1 day to read it and it was absolutely excellent. I am so glad I took the time to check it out. Thank you for using your talents and creating this work.

  15. Alan says:

    Just finished reading this. Excellent. I hope to read more from you. And I hope you'll be able to publish this.

  16.  
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