Comments on: Hell on $5 a Day: I Hate Writing The Synopsis http://www.brainhandles.com/hell-on-5/hell-on-5-a-day-i-hate-writing-the-synopsis Whatever's tugging at my brain handles Tue, 27 Dec 2011 19:46:46 +0000 hourly 1 By: Greg Bulmash http://www.brainhandles.com/hell-on-5/hell-on-5-a-day-i-hate-writing-the-synopsis/comment-page-1#comment-8229 Greg Bulmash Wed, 25 Mar 2009 19:29:41 +0000 http://www.brainhandles.com/?p=1653#comment-8229 </b>Well, I used this in a recent agent query ("Hi, I wrote a book, would you like to try to sell it?") letter:<blockquote>In 1943, the U.S. army took five hardcases and put them in a room with a hungry vampire, planning to turn them into a new type of elite combat unit. In the present day, three are dead, the two survivors are mortal enemies, and ex-sergeant Alain Beaudreaux is planning a one-man raid on the 9th ring of Hell to steal back the part of his soul that was taken as collateral. His travels through Hell form the core of _Hell on $5 a Day_. Alain fell in love with a mortal early on, swore off blood, married her, and stayed with her until she died of old age. He planned, with the lost part of his soul in his possession, to make his way from Hell through Purgatory and into Heaven to plead his case for salvation. What he didn't plan on was having two mortals for company or having to pin his hopes on a junior copywriter who literally fell into this adventure.</blockquote> I'll consider Readalot's for the next one. I've sent out three query letters, received one response, and they passed after reading the 33-page sample (Chapter 1 up through Alain drinking the lamb's blood). I've got one query letter outstanding. Torn between blasting out 20 queries or trying to do them in batches of one or two. This will be the third time I've hunted for a literary agent. The first time, I was 22 and got one interested in a screenplay I'd written. But at that time I'd just gone back to college after a couple years off, had the first straight-A report card of my life, and decided to concentrate on school instead of doing the rewrite he wanted. The second time I got an agent for a book proposal based on my "where are they now" column, but she wasn't able to get a publisher on board with it. Based on prior experience, I should be able to get an agent on board. It's just a matter of time. Well, I used this in a recent agent query ("Hi, I wrote a book, would you like to try to sell it?") letter:
In 1943, the U.S. army took five hardcases and put them in a room with a hungry vampire, planning to turn them into a new type of elite combat unit. In the present day, three are dead, the two survivors are mortal enemies, and ex-sergeant Alain Beaudreaux is planning a one-man raid on the 9th ring of Hell to steal back the part of his soul that was taken as collateral. His travels through Hell form the core of _Hell on $5 a Day_.

Alain fell in love with a mortal early on, swore off blood, married her, and stayed with her until she died of old age. He planned, with the lost part of his soul in his possession, to make his way from Hell through Purgatory and into Heaven to plead his case for salvation. What he didn't plan on was having two mortals for company or having to pin his hopes on a junior copywriter who literally fell into this adventure.

I'll consider Readalot's for the next one. I've sent out three query letters, received one response, and they passed after reading the 33-page sample (Chapter 1 up through Alain drinking the lamb's blood). I've got one query letter outstanding. Torn between blasting out 20 queries or trying to do them in batches of one or two.

This will be the third time I've hunted for a literary agent. The first time, I was 22 and got one interested in a screenplay I'd written. But at that time I'd just gone back to college after a couple years off, had the first straight-A report card of my life, and decided to concentrate on school instead of doing the rewrite he wanted. The second time I got an agent for a book proposal based on my "where are they now" column, but she wasn't able to get a publisher on board with it. Based on prior experience, I should be able to get an agent on board. It's just a matter of time.

]]> By: SA Kid http://www.brainhandles.com/hell-on-5/hell-on-5-a-day-i-hate-writing-the-synopsis/comment-page-1#comment-8228 SA Kid Wed, 25 Mar 2009 18:45:41 +0000 http://www.brainhandles.com/?p=1653#comment-8228 Like Readalots' synopsis. His would sell the book. On a different note, I see I'm not the only one who thought of Captain America as your novel started! Like Readalots' synopsis. His would sell the book.

On a different note, I see I'm not the only one who thought of Captain America as your novel started!

]]> By: Readalot http://www.brainhandles.com/hell-on-5/hell-on-5-a-day-i-hate-writing-the-synopsis/comment-page-1#comment-8203 Readalot Sun, 22 Mar 2009 16:05:51 +0000 http://www.brainhandles.com/?p=1653#comment-8203 Leave off the bit about the two mortals at the end. the rest seems fine. My version. During WWII the US Army started a top secret project to create "Super Soldiers" - by creating vampires. The Army chose only those enlisted men it considered expendable - men with a proven record of violence, men whose souls, they thought, were already damned, men who would not be missed - men like Alain Bordeaux. But official records don't tell everything - and Alain Bordeaux was good. And while the Army could make him a vampire, they couldn't make him evil. Alain's faith was rewarded with the love of a mortal woman, and a form of salvation. Now, his beloved wife dead of old age, Alain is determined to join her in heaven. To do that, he has to go through Hell, all of Dante's Inferno, and find his lost soul. Leave off the bit about the two mortals at the end. the rest seems fine.

My version.

During WWII the US Army started a top secret project to create "Super Soldiers" - by creating vampires. The Army chose only those enlisted men it considered expendable - men with a proven record of violence, men whose souls, they thought, were already damned, men who would not be missed - men like Alain Bordeaux. But official records don't tell everything - and Alain Bordeaux was good. And while the Army could make him a vampire, they couldn't make him evil. Alain's faith was rewarded with the love of a mortal woman, and a form of salvation.
Now, his beloved wife dead of old age, Alain is determined to join her in heaven. To do that, he has to go through Hell, all of Dante's Inferno, and find his lost soul.

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